Tag Archives: Jay-Z, DeShawn Stevenson and the Feud

LeBron James’ trademark move is…the TRAVEL!…err…the CRAB DRIBBLE!

6 Jan

...and crying, of course. And charging.

It happened.  LeBron was finally called for a frame-by-frame recreation of The Travel.  And against the poor Washington Wizards of all teams – LeBron’s original victims.  Amazing.  The NBA’s officiating is in such a sorry state that it is nearly impossible for anyone to believe that LeBron could actually be whistled for traveling, even when it is the most painfully obvious example of traveling possible (I’ll get to that later).  So unbelievable that when he is called out, it becomes a major media event.  Check out Caron Butler’s reaction after the game: It’s a travel. It was the exact same move two years ago in the playoffs. I definitely knew he traveled, but I didn’t think they were gonna call it…But that was one of them situations in which a great player made a move, good officiation, and they called the call. And I was just like, ‘Aw, man. There is a God. There is a God.’

That a professional basketball player could have such an extreme reaction to this whole crab dribble travel call episode really says it all.  Caron Butler evidently feels that it requires some kind of divine intervention in order for LeBron to be correctly charged with a traveling violation. Or, at the very least, that such a call constitutes proof of the existence of GOD.

Of course, this was a meaningless game, and a pretty safe game for the refs to have grown a conscience.  LeBron has been pulling this shit in the playoffs for years.  If a playoff game is close in the fourth quarter, the crab is guaranteed to make an appearance or two.  Or twelve.  I bet that won’t change this year or ever.

Anyway, back to the story…as with most King James fiascos, LeBron’s obnoxious reaction is more than half the fun.  How pathetic is it that LeBron has the nerve to 1. complain to the refs about such a valid call (including a re-enactment to the ref during the game – where was the tech!?), 2. claim that even after he had seen the tape in the locker room that it was still not a travel and then 3. be so bold as to go in front of the media and bitch about it knowing full well that he has won entire playoffs series on no-calls from the same move.   Answer: it is quite pathetic.  And he kept bitching about it the day after the game, after having the benefit of watching it replayed on sportscenter 600 times:

On Sunday, James said it was a “bad call” and that “they need to look at it and they need to understand that’s not a travel.”   In giving his take on what happened, James said: “I watched it again, and I took a ‘crab dribble,’ which is a hesitation dribble, and then two steps.”

Ugh.  LeBron must honestly believe that he can do no wrong.

Unfortunately, apart from racking up a meaningless loss against a non-contender, LeBron came away from this episode completely unscathed, as usual – he wasn’t given a tech for complaining directly to the ref (Oh, I’m sorry – explaining to the ref) and he wasn’t fined for repeatedly and directly criticizing the officiating after the game (are they going to return Eddie Jordan’s $25K for complaining about a no-call on the very same move back in 2006?).

One more item of note – the valiant Mr. Potato Head made a point to get thrown out of the game arguing a charging foul called on LeBron (LeBron’s other signature move).  He couldn’t just sit by and watch LeBron being so blatantly subjected to the rules of basketball for an entire game.  The officiating was just so terribly fair that night, apparently.

Because Mr. Potato Head and many reporters are apparently retarded and because LeBron apparently has some psychological condition that prevents him from viewing rapidly moving images on a television screen and processing them properly in his LeBrain, let’s break this shit down, frame-by-frame, by using youtube and the offical NBA rulebook.  And Jalen Rose.

First, the rule:

Section XIV-Traveling
a. A player who receives the ball while standing still may pivot, using either foot as the pivot foot.
b. A player who receives the ball while he is progressing or upon completion of a dribble, may use a two-count rhythm in coming to a stop, passing or shooting the ball.
The first count occurs:
(1) As he receives the ball, if either foot is touching the floor at the time he receives it.
(2) As the foot touches the floor, or as both feet touch the floor simultaneously after he receives the ball, if both feet are off the floor when he receives it.
The second occurs:
(1) After the count of one when either foot touches the floor, or both feet touch the floor simultaneously.
c. A player who comes to a stop on the count of one may pivot, using either foot as the pivot foot.
d. A player who comes to a stop on the count of two, with one foot in advance of the other, may pivot using only the rear foot as the pivot foot.
e. A player who comes to a stop on the count of two, with neither foot in advance of the other, may use either foot as the pivot foot.
f. In starting a dribble after (1) receiving the ball while standing still, or (2) coming to a legal stop, the ball must be out of the player’s hand before the pivot foot is raised off the floor.
g. If a player, with the ball in his possession, raises his pivot foot off the floor, he must pass or shoot before his pivot foot returns to the floor. If he drops the ball while in the air, he may not be the first to touch the ball.
h. A player who falls to the floor while holding the ball, or while coming to a stop, may not gain an advantage by sliding.
i. A player who attempts a field goal may not be the first to touch the ball if it fails to touch the backboard, basket ring or another player.
PENALTY: Loss of ball. The ball is awarded to the opposing team at the sideline, nearest spot of the violation but no nearer the baseline than the foul line extended.

Okay – so the NBA rulebook isn’t as crystal-clear as it could be.  However, after much difficulty, it is possible to translate this strangely-worded crap and come away with the fact that you get TWO STEPS after picking up your dribble in most situations.  I think.  Anyway – let’s assume two.  It’s certainly not more than two, in any situation, obviously.

On to the visual evidence and Jalen Rose (hope they don’t pull this video down):

Wow – I think that may have actually been five steps.

Also, the feud kinda lives.  Injured DeShawn Steven was apparently taunting from the sidelines in a ridiculous purple velvet suit and bowtie.  I would have loved to have heard what kind of vicious trash talk DeShawn Stevenson was dishing out immediately following that travel call.  Of course, LeBron refused to participate in the back-and-forth because he is above all that.  And because he couldn’t say a damn thing.

Suck. It. LeBron.

Suck. It. LeBron.

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The Feud

30 Apr

Alright. I’m sick of the feud, you’re sick of the feud. However, for the sake of completeness, I’m going to provide one last round of updates.

First, I found the actual audio of the Jay Z’s lame Wizards-bashing song.

Not that I’m a rap aficionado, but I can confidently say this some corny crap (refrain is “blow the whistle” followed by cheesy whistle sound effect).

In the first few lines, Jay Z, like LeBron, completely fails to grasp the irony of saying crap like:

Ask my [buddy] LeBron, so big we ain’t gotta respond.

When you’re talking to a don, please respect like you’re talking to your mom

Dude, you can’t say “I am not going to bother responding to you,” proceed to write a song, go through the trouble of driving to the studio and recording an entire track complete with goofy sound effects, and then include a lyric of “I am not going to bother reponding to you” in that very same song. It’s self-contradictory. Whatever, I’ve beat this dead horse, so I’ll move on. After that, the lyrics just get downright strange:

Who the fuck is overrated?

If anything they underpaid him

Hate and [some shit I can’t make out] gonna make him

Spend a night outta spite with the chick you’ve been dating

Whaaa!? Guess Stevenson better watch his chick around LeBron. Or something like that. Weird. Seriously?

Of course Jay Z opens with some crap about Brooklyn this and that. Obvious hint or what?

Okay, so now we have the Jay Z rap covered. Last item of business – I actually found the quote from DeShawn Stevenson describing the origin of the feud (from Scoop Jackson at espn.com):

“[LeBron] said something about my game. He said I’m getting a lot of hype this year, that he doesn’t think I’m the good player I am and basically that I suck, our team sucks and we’re not going anywhere. I took offense to that,” Stevenson was quoted as saying in The New York Times. “If LeBron James never said that comment, we wouldn’t have the rivalry we have right now.”

Okay, that’s it. I hope.

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Throat slash fine for Stevenson

29 Apr

Wow!  Right on cue!  Thanks for validating the shit that I just finished typing about you, David Stern.  So, Stevenson is fined for a throat slash gesture towards the Cavaliers bench, huh?  Funny, there is a COMPLETELY IDENTICAL situation in which LeBron did the SAME THING to the Wizard’s bench in a past Wizards/Cavs playoff series and, IMAGINE THAT, NO FINE.  No foul, no tech, no nothing.

Seriously.  For the love of fuck, this is ridiculous.  The NBA is making it easy for me.

This is apples to apples, people. If this doesn’t constitute absolute proof of shameless LeBron favoritism at the highest levels of the NBA, I don’t know what does.

LeBron James - where's the tech?

Let me talk to David…there has to be some kind of mistake. Do you know who I am?

UPDATE: Damon Jones also did the throat slash gesture and didn’t get fined.

Damon Jones is a douche

Could I be any more of a douchebag without hanging out with the famous internet Heineken guidos? Nope.

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The Great Jay-Z Enters the Ring

27 Apr

This shit is so played-out that the New Republic is writing about it.

I’m sick and tired of this LeBron/Stevenson BS already.  Most of all, I am sick of hearing the TV announcers repeat that shit over and over.  It has gotten so bad that the network produced graphic overlays to explain the whole thing to the viewers during game four.  Please, cut that shit out.  When a couple of crackerjack TV announcers are explaining some rapper shit to you, it loses whatever mystique and coolness it might have had at that very instant.

So, to summarize – some DJ in a DC club played an anti-Wizards song from Jay Z prior to Sunday’s game.  Butler, who was the only Wizard to attend the party, felt slighted and left the party, rather than beat somebody up.

First off, that moron DJ needs to check himself before he finds himself spinning tiny-bopper hits in some Clevaland shithole or floating face down in the Anacostia.  Hometown loyalty, asshole.  Second, Jay Z pretty much undermined the whole “I’m too good to respond to insults from lesser chumps” argument by recording that dumb song, now didn’t he?

A Village Voice blog entry sums up this nonsense better than I can, and gets to the essential core of Jay Z’s involvement in this whole fiasco:

Ah: To make this relevant to your life, Jay-Z is probably siding with Lebron here because he aims to woo the guy from Cleveland to Brooklyn in a couple years, just in time to join the relocated Nets, who will play in a fancy new arena whose construction will probably involve bulldozing your apartment.

Uh…yup.  I’l leave it at that.

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Worst Playoff Loss in Cavs History

25 Apr

Wow. A 36 point blowout. Worst in Cavaliers history, apparently. And the Wizards didn’t need to victimize LeBron with hard fouls, elbow anybody in the face, or entice the refs to throw out the Cav’s best big man to make it happen. Best of all, Soulja Boy was there to see the whole thing. Sadly, LeBron’s good friend Jay Z was not able to make the game.

Best part of the game apart from Stevenson lighting it up? Caron Butler ripping the ball out of LeBron’s hands, running the length of the floor, and dunking. Oh yeah, the constant booing every time LeBron touched the ball and the chants of “overrated!” when LeBron went to the foul line late in the game were also pretty satisfying.

LeBron saw quite a bit of this tonight:

DeShawn Stevenson - suck it LeBron

I can’t feel my face!

Getting blown out in franchise record-breaking fashion – another fine addition to the ever-growing list of LeBron’s accomplishements.

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